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File:Coffee-House Propoganda.png

Episode Number

Description

Cast (in order of appearance): {{Film|Character}}

TranscriptEdit

{{PG-13/R/NC-17}}

{The Warning screen appears.}

Franklin: Hello!!! Welcome to Star-schmuck's coffeehouses...... (Foamy appears)

Foamy: Yea, yea, yea, shut up and listen!!!!! I got this fucking flyer in the mail (shows a flier with Star-schmucks written on it) from your god-damn cofeehouse establishment! Are you people sick?

Franklin: What seems to be the problem, sir? It's just a simple flyer to tell you how to order your coffee. Because you mere mortals don't know what you're doing.

Foamy: Right, so you're telling me that you and your company think your customers are so stupid that you actually have to give them a set of directions on how to order a cup of coffee. (holds the paper in his hands)

Franklin: Have you ever worked as a barista? Oh, it's hell.

Foamy: Barista? What the hell is a fucking barista? Is that Mexican for no-nothing coffee-swill serving, asshole? If that's pretty accurate, (holds the paper) And what the fuck is with this phrase? What image does your drink convey about you?

Franklin: It just means that when you get a Star-schmuck's coffee, you convey a certain image. Any image that is ab-fab. That's absolutely fabulous for you untrendy folks

Foamy: Ohhhh....I see, I see. So your flyer says (holds a flyer that says: How 2 order our swill) as long as I'm carrying (has a Starschmucks coffee in his hand) a Star-schmucks coffeecup, I'll convey the image of a trendy individual, loved by all (tosses cup) and accepted by the coffee house illuminati.

Franklin: That's right! (holds a Gay Pride flag)


Foamy: Oh yeah? Who the fuck are you to tell me how to order a cup of coffee? I'm the customer, you're the servant! If I say 'Get me a large cheese and coffee with no sucky undertaste' You say, 'Yes sir' and get it! If I tell you to shoot yourself in the head, you say 'Yes sir' and do it!

Franklin: Um, we don't have large.

Foamy: Oh, don't get me started on that bullshit, asshole! Your coffeehouse propaganda will not work on me!!!! You fuckers are like the Nazis of the coffeehouse circuit (does a Hitler salute in one hand and holds a cup labeled Nazi Java in the other, crumples the cup up, throws it on Franklin, hotting him in the head) so fuck you, fuck your flier and fuck your directs on how to order coffee. Look at this! (gets out a Doon-Kin Don-Nutzz coffee cup) It's a Doon-kin Don-nutzz coffee cup! Ha! I shun you and your trendy fucking coffee-house bullshit.

Franklin: Please!!! That cup is so out of style!

Foamy: Uh-huh, (shows cup) How about burning your face off with the scolding hot contents of this out-of-date coffee cup? That trendy enough for ya?

Franklin: Um, that type of violence went out of style with those Freddy Krueger films. He was such a bitch!

Foamy: Hey, Freddy vs. Jason kicked ass, like what everyone says.
Franklin: I knew I should've stayed in Massachusetts.

Foamy: Oh I see, fleeing the country to avoid the subject, huh?

{The Ending screen appears.}

Foamy: Coffeehouse propaganda no more!

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